As I looked through post after post, I was reminded of all the feelings that disappeared the second Ella was placed in my arms for forever. The aching, the longing, and the dreaming as I waited for my baby to come home. I am reminded daily how faithful God is and that His timing truly is PERFECT!
The road of adoption is full of bumps and detours. It is by NO MEANS easy, BUT the outcome is incredible! The moment your baby (toddler, child, teen) is placed in your arms is indescribable. At that moment, all the pain you have gone through disappears. All the nights I stayed up praying, longing for my baby girl are worth it; the million trips to the post office to next-day all of our paperwork are worth it; the many phone calls, emails, and meetings with congressmen, the DNA lab, and lawyers- ALL worth it! Nothing goes as planned, but God shows up and is with us EVERY STEP of the way.
I can see God's hand in Ella's adoption. It is simply a miracle that she is with us today. When we committed to adopt Ella on December 6, 2008, we knew that it would take a miracle to get registered by December 30. All the papers and appointments that normally take months to complete had to be done in less than 30 days. And on January 16, 2008, when many families were told news that no adoptive parent wants to hear (they were not registered, and their adoption would not be completed until adoptions opened up again), we were blown away and praising our Father for the approval to adopt Ella. This was just the start of the troubles that we faced as Guatemalan adoptions were closing. They put many new steps in place and made the process harder and harder, but God stayed faithful and brought His daughter, Gloria Esmeralda, to our family. We met so many wonderful people during our adoption journeys, both from the U.S. and Guatemala. Because of every little thing, we are where we are today- a wonderfully blessed, crazy family of eight-, and for it we are forever thankful.
I will never forget those 10 and a half months of waiting for Gabriela Marie. I had to surrender every single day to God. During those 10 and a half months (and the 7 and a half months with Joe), I saw God in a way that I had never seen Him before.
So, as I looked back through my archives, I was reminded of God's greatness... and of the feelings that I went through. I found a poem that I wrote almost two years ago in March.
Dear Ella,
Today's a day we wait for you,
Not knowing actually what to do.
We cannot stand the time without you here,
We want to hold you close and near.
But we must wait and trust our God above,
He's covered you with so much love.
So wait we will, and dream about the day,
You'll be home with us, home to stay.
You have so much family loving you,
Mama, Daddy, sisters, brothers, aunts, uncles, grandparents, Great Papa, too.
We love you though we have not met,
The love for you grows deeper yet.
Love, Mommy
As a family, we have changed a lot. And, sweet Ella has changed too. She is a social butterfly, waving and saying "Hi!" to everyone she sees. She talks up a storm and loves to sing! She's always walking around singing "Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so!". Isn't that what it's all about? She knows that we love her, but, most importantly, she knows that Jesus loves her!!!
Some people may praise US for changing ELLA'S life, but really it was ELLA who changed OUR lives.
